Epic Fail Much?

 this is a story i wrote about a year ago when my cousin was living with my parents and I. I think it's funny, tell me what you think!


    It's 2:11AM, and I feel the need to get some corn pops. Now if any of you have even been in my house you'll know that this is no easy task. Seeing as how the my parents bedroom, or as I like to call it; The Dragon's Den, is positioned directly beside the great white box of succulent goodness. Despite the danger I silently crept up the stairs with the taste of corn pops lingering on my tongue creating a nostalgia for what was early this morning. I open the cupboard and fumble through the cereal boxes until I find the one holding the golden pops. Its yellow exterior glistening in the moonlight shining in from the dining room window. Now with the key ingredient, I have one more task. It would be too noisy to "create" this spectacular blend of milk and golden pops upstairs, so I have to take all my ingredients downstairs before I can feast. As I'm collecting the utensils necessary for such a creation I hear Taylor climbing the steps behind me. He walks into the kitchen and whispers "sup" and I give him the cliche sup head nod and walk past him to grab the milk. I then walk back past him again to grab my pops, cause I gotta have my pops, to start the long journey back downstairs. Now this is where it gets weird; there must have been at least two feet of space for me to pass Taylor but for some reason, some godforsaken reason, this had to happen. The jug of milk I am carrying is fresh, so it weighs about a pound. Now if you get enough momentum behind something like that you could create a lot of noise, especially when its the middle of the night. I go to walk past Taylor but for the aforementioned godforsaken reason my arm holding the jug of milk bumps into his arm with enough force to make his hand holding a half full glass of water crash into the side of the cupboard and cut his hand before falling to the conglomerate tile to shatter.The glass shattering sounded like a nuclear explosion as it echoed throughout the house. We stood there looking at each other with a look of complete failure reflected off one anothers face. What seemed like several minutes was only a few seconds, and it only took a few seconds for the dragon to emerge from her den. She looked out from the door at us, myself half expecting her to torch us with great flames carried from her vicious mouth. But she was surprisingly chill about it, she asked what had broken, told us where the broom and dustpan were (which took us 20 minutes to find) and then went back to bed. We cleaned up the shattered remains of the fallen glass and then headed back downstairs laughing to ourselves about what had just happened. Oh and yeah i did end up enjoying those corn pops. There was something special about them, a kind of justification as to why i should be eating them.

Time

something i wrote in 12th grade english(my earlier writings lack structure and substance... i may go back and re-write them)

,.-Time-.,

Can you feel that? The seconds falling away from under your feet as you read every word that I've written. Time... it's just a four letter word, but it encompasses all that is and all that ever will be; try to fathom that, I dare you. Think of the rivers of blood shed so that a king or an emperor could be the momentary master of a time so insignificant and distant now. Think of every moment -- first love, first child -- ever experienced by a human being... Time holds the future, instills the past, and shares the present. Time is life and life is perception. Whose to say what's wrong and what's right? Whose to say what will work and what will fade away. Whose to say what path to choose, a decision so trifling you must not lose. And whose to say that you made the wrong decision when your heart knows your right but your mind takes flight from these evil lies they incite. Your to say what's wrong and what's right! Your to say that "it'll work have some foresight!" and your to choose which path to walk; a decision so humbling cause you know you've chosen right. Life is six point six billion glistening diamonds, undiscovered, waiting to be shared. We shall not fear death for nothing ever ends. What we do in this life echoes in eternity and a diamond is indestructible. And if you don't know by now the diamonds represent our accomplishments and our mistakes, our legacy, our memory. It's a thing of beauty... but of course only if you perceive it to be. So live life to the fullest, I hope the minutes you spent reading this weren't wasted, you'll never get them back.